Thursday, June 14, 2007

You Rule!

Alright, Ezzie tagged me with this (for which I am very honored, oh blogmaster Ezzie, when you read this), so I'll do my best. Please bear in mind that this is full of generalizations, so don't jump down my throat for assuming that it refers to any one specific place.

You rule, Oh Clique-iest Clique of High School Girls! Without you, who would know whom to snub, what definitely, like, not to wear, and which barrette goes best with the uniform? Your amazingly keen sense of nerdiness and how to stay far, far away from it surely helps keep your perfect little outfits from any sort of contamination. You're not mean, or standoffish - you just have a deeply-felt sense of self-preservation. We understand. So when you don't talk to us, or look at us, we know that you simply are trying to communicate to us just where we are on the social totem pole. That way, we won't misstep our place or anything, which could be fatal, for us and for you. Thank you, clique-y ones, for allowing us to know our status in life. Thank you for introducing us to the world of perpetually glossy hair, weekly new wardrobes and Goachi bags (you know, fake Coach + fake Gucci). In fact, to thank you, we'll give you a no-contract cell phone, so you're not locked into any of those icky plans or anything. And when the shoe style changes next season, you can change your cell phone plan along with it. What more could be better? Oh, and for an teeny extra fee, we'll throw in a cell phone cover to match your handbag. So run, don't walk, because supplies are limited to the first fifty girls pushing and shoving to get this great deal. Competition will be fierce, ladies, so remember to file those nails and wear your extra-pointy shoes so that you'll have some, uh, clawing and scratching leverage. Buh-bye now!


Ezzie said...

[claps long and hard]

Excellent! :)

Scraps said...

Lol! Brilliant! :-D

the apple said...


Why, thank you.